Making new yoga friends may not be your ‘top priority’ in life, but if you don’t want to make any yoga ‘frenemies’ and you want to ensure that people will move their mats over to squeeze you in next time you show up late to a packed yoga class, here is what to do…
1. Nobody else has the Miley Cyrus ringtone, we all know its you. Be a good yogi and take the walk of shame over to the ‘cubbies’ and turn it off. We forgive you, admire you a little (that took guts!) and you just earned yourself some good karma points too!
2. Leaving your yogitoes ‘skidless’ mat cover rolled up in your yoga mat so that the bacteria can fester and breed in the tropical like conditions of your car trunk is not called being ‘eco-friendly’ it called something else,…disgusting! (Ewwww.) If you breed a new kind of Fungi on that thing that is later named after you don’t say I didn’t warn you…wash it! (The entire yoga class thanks you! )
3. We understand you like burritos and we do too,… but not before yoga class please. (I thought we talked about this, no?)
4. Chewing gum is a yoga don’t, and it’s not just because everyone is jealous over how cool and nonchalant you look rolling into class with a mouthful of Blueberry Blast Bubbalicious. (Although admittedly, that is a factor)
5. There is your ‘garden variety’ moaning, and then there are moans of a different ‘variety’,…let’s keep it PG here people. Do it for the children,… and the people around you trying really hard not to die laughing. (or throw up a little bit in their mouth)